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Seduction and the Monkey World...

Apparently, researchers can get funding for the darndest things. I just read an article entitled, "Monkeys, Too, Will Pay for Sex" on the Discovery News. This "money for sex" theory is premised on the notion that the grooming that male monkeys dote upon female monkeys is the equivalent of currency.

From what is shared in the article the researchers fall short of arguing that there is some sort of prostitution going in the monkey world. Rather, they equate the the grooming in the monkey world to how men pay for dates in the human world. Apparently there are quite a few similarities.

Like with humans, some monkeys are considered hotter than others. If you're the hottie female monkey you are in high demand. Apparently, you can hold out for the highest bidder, or the most dutiful and skilled groomer. However, if you're not as attractive, you are devalued and you should take whatever grooming you can get.

Since they can't talk and don't have access to Sephora, apprently monkeys are motivated entirely by physical attraction. There's no talking to someone and finding out what they're really about. There's no "she may not be much to look at, but she's got a really good heart and makes a mean macaroni and cheese". Rather, who the men choose to invest their time grooming is determined by who gets them hot.

Don't think that subtlety is lost on the monkeys. Apparently, they're winking and smiling and smacking their lips too. Just like humans, monkeys must work to get their groove on. Who knew?!

Even though the monkey sex stuff was funny, what was more funny was the researcher who compared the dowry that he paid for his wife to the grooming done by the male monkeys. Apparently he received no material gifts in return. However, he admits that "I did get to marry my wife." I am assuming that is code for "I got sex just like the monkeys!"

You can access the Discovery News article at:
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