Tuesday

Mommy Mondays: Having it all, "Sex, Work, and Motherhood"

Me and my guy

All of the Baptist style preaching that went on at the Democratic National Convention inspired me to preach a bit myself.  However, I don't want to talk about God. Like Salt-N-Pepa said in that old song, "let's talk about sex ".

They say you shouldn't discuss religion,  politics or sex. However, that's at work. In Chaton's World we can discuss all topics because we're amongst friends!

The Secret to Having it All 

One of the issues women have been dancing around in the "having it all debate" is the role of sex in a working woman's life.  Lest you think this is going to be a tell-all about my own sex life with Andre calm down.  Yes, he is super hot and we do have a baby. So, you can let your imagination run wild about my life. 

Instead, I'd just like to make the point that sex matters.
I say that somewhat tongue in cheek. I know that I am not sharing anything particularly enlightening. I  also say it to encourage women who are in the quest to "have it all" to view their lives comprehensively.

We have so many demands as professionals and as mothers that it is easy to sacrifice our relationships. There is only so much time in the day to get everything done. And sex often seems "optional". I have heard a lot of parents say that they don't remember the last time they had sex and they're married!


Indeed, most of the articles about "having it all", including the article by Anne Marie Slaughter in  "The Atlantic", describe the challenges that women have balancing high-powered careers with motherhood without any mention of a romantic life, which is enlightening.  Indeed, Slaughter worked two hours away from home, worked for the state department, and mothered two teenage boys.  Perhaps she didn't discuss her romantic life because it was nonexistent...

As professional women, we have to carefully define what we mean by "having it all". It's not just about looking good, making lots of money, and having well adjusted children.  Those things matter. However, if we value our relationships, we need to figure out how to make them work too.
Read this article, HBR: Sex and the Working Mom. It discusses the issue directly. When discussing taking an overseas assignment, one woman says that her husband told her that "there will be sex in this house once a week whether you're her or not."

Let me know your thoughts!
Enhanced by Zemanta
Post a Comment