|Toddler seated on toilet with magazine. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)|
"There is not enough Xanax to get you through potty training..." Said by a mom on the Internet
I had my agenda despite what I have learned by being a working mom, which is "toddlers can be HUGE time wasters". My evening tonight reminded me of the need to be flexible.
My daughter had a rough day at school. Apparently, she was antsy and non-compliant. She only earned 9/10 points, but she took it in stride. It turned out that she was antsy and non-compliant because she had to go poopy. Although she is potty trained she struggles with going poopy. It's unclear how she developed this fear, but it is real and it turns our normally joyful toddler into a teary, constipated mess.
This evening, I inherited the teary, constipated toddler. It broke my heart and I became a teary mommy...
As a working mom, I view each potty training setback as a failureThe little thing had to go, but wouldn't give into it. She'd try, stay there for a long time and then get up. She'd try, urinate, celebrate and demand a treat, and then give up. This went on for hours. We had Raisin Bran for dinner because, well you know...
Still, no results. Finally, we both tired of trying. I put a Pampers "Easy Up" on her and she asked to go to bed. She had no shower, no bath and her teeth went unbrushed. Instead, she drifted off to sleep, probably with visions of the good old days dancing in her head--the good old days when she could stay home all day, do what she wanted and wear a diaper.
I think about those days too. I also think about the days that we never experienced--the days where I could have stayed at home, taught her things and potty trained her. Because my working mom's guilt runs deep, every set back she has makes me doubt my parenting choices. Would she have been better off with me as a stay-at-home mom? We'll never know. Still...
What we do know is that we have a little girl who is having a rough time. Because I am her mother, I take that personally and want to take her pain away.
Now that I have written this post, I realize that there are things more important than my agenda. I actually didn't waste my time, I spent it helping a very special little girl try to overcome an obstacle. I failed, but it was still time well spent.
Let's hope we have better results today!