Tuesday

In Honor of Mother's Day, Let's Stop Mommy Shaming!

A date night last summer


While I was watching the Today Show today I saw a segment on "Mommy Shaming". It was based on all of the shade being thrown at Chrissy Teigan because she had the audacity to enjoy a Post-Partum Date Night within weeks of delivering her baby. I thought about writing about it. Then when my friend, Tammy texted me about it, I knew I had to write about it.



Christine Teigen on Twitter: "I went to dinner. People are pissed. Good morning! https://t.co/oQ54mtet8c"

I have to say that I am thoroughly impressed that Chrissy had the inclination, fortitude and the commitment to actually go on a date with her husband within weeks of having her first child. I went out with my husband six weeks after having my first child, reluctantly and I was getting an award for Pittsburgh's 40 Under 40.  Since I don't know Chrissy, I don't know how she felt on her date. All I can say is that I have to give her props because she was strutting in her stilettos! (For a link to a photo of her and her husband, the ever so handsome John Legend, click here.)

Go Chrissy Teigan!!!

I don't need anybody else to shame me, I do it myself.

That said, as a student of social media I have read the comments about Chrissy and I can attest that people are mad, especially other moms. (To read their thoughts, click here.) They are more than mad. They are outraged that Chrissy had the audacity to go on a date with her husband. The reaction surprises me somewhat. Rather than be outraged, moms could have been impressed. However, the majority of people were simply hopping mad.

This kind of judging and mom shaming is an epidemic. Last year, I auditioned for a reality TV show that was targeted at moms. I failed in my audition because I fell short when asked about how I judge other moms. The truth is, I fail daily as a mom. As a working mom, I leave my baby in the care of another woman every day and if he's awake, he screams, "I want mommy!!!" like he's never been left before. He knows the drill, but wants me to know that he thinks the entire thing is b---s---.

And each time I hear him cry I feel terrible and a little like a failure. I question my choices. I question my wisdom. I question myself. I am ashamed...  

Let's stop shaming moms and let's start celebrating them.  


Because of my own reality, there was no way I was going on television judging other moms. Someone who knows me would say, I hear that some days, her laundry overflows and she has yelled at her kids and her husband--at the same time. They might show photos that show that on at least one occasion I left the house without any makeup and my clothes needed to be ironed.

Needless to say, I won't be publicly shaming any mom. I am too afraid I'll be called out. So, you see. It is fear, not moral superiority, that stops me from judging. Also, my own challenges as a mom have humbled me.  There's might be a special place in hell for moms who judge other moms.

With Mother's Day approaching I say we make a pact. Let's all agree to stop shaming moms and celebrating them! What do you think?

Post a Comment