Our due date is here and Andre and I are excited about meeting our new baby. Every morning we look at my stomach and try to encourage the baby to arrive. Every morning, the baby plays us. We imagine that the baby is thumbing its nose at us and laughing—thinking how confused we are to believe that we can get it to change its timeline.
Even though I knew how excited Andre and I would be I had no idea how excited family and friends would be.
When I call people there is a
pregnant pause. I hear the excitement in their voices. They believe that I have important news to share. And I can hear their disappointment when I just say, “hello”.
Every day I receive text messages asking whether I have made any progress. Every day I have nothing to report. People have asked me about my predictions. However, never having gone through this before, I have no predictions. I actually have nothing worthwhile to report. The only thing that I can say is, “We’ll see.”
People have called asking for help with travel plans so that they can help me after the baby is born. They ask me when is the “best time” to come. They want to maximize their time here. They want to be helpful. And while I am grateful for the help, I have no useful information to provide. I want to say, “If the doctor doesn’t know how should I know?!”
In many ways this
pregnancy has been an exercise in humility. I cannot remember the last time that I waited for anything that I really wanted. However, now all I can do is give in to the natural rhythm of things. I am doing my best to relax, but the suspense is almost unbearable!
Most importantly, this pregnancy has taught me that
God is in control. He always was. I just needed a reminder…
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