One Secret to a Working Mom's Success: Keep Standing

Me, standing in Barbados Those of us who live our lives out loud on the internet subject ourselves to scrutiny. Some comment, "Nobody's life is perfect. These posts must be fake," Those making those comments might even be close to us because they "know our business" and they whisper and gossip and say, "she's so fake".  To those who may read my blog and make such comments, (the trolls) know that I hear you, see you, and completely disagree. 

A Peek Into the Life of a Working Mom: Medicating Your Way Through Motherhood with Xanax

I have learned that parenting can be a roller coaster ride. Our lives were already jam-packed before we became parents. Our jobs were demanding, we had family obligations, and we had full social lives. We also managed to work out regularly. We had it all!

After our daughter was born, somehow our lives grew to accommodate her little life and all of her things. And we did it gladly. It still amazes me how someone so small has completely transformed our lives and demands so much attention.
 

Our lives did not slow down with our parenting obligations.


The thing the rest of our lives did not slow down because our responsibilities increased. Indeed, from a family responsibility perspective, Andre has actually undertaken more projects at his parents house than he did before we had our daughter, I have gotten promoted at work, and our social obligations remain. Truthfully, we have cut back considerably on the social obligations and the working out, but the bathroom still needs to get cleaned, the floors still need to get vacuumed and the dishes still need to get washed. Figuring out how to do it all can get overwhelming. Sometimes I scream, shout and throw a fit.  I never turn to drugs to manage my stress, but apparently a lot of mothers do.
 

Apparently there are pills to help you manage the demands of parenting...


I have never relied on drugs to help me manage my life. I don't say that with any pride or sense of superiority. It's just a fact. Indeed, I never even thought about going to the doctor to give me something to help my life go down a little easier.  However, I have experienced challenges, lots of them. In the first few weeks of my daughter life I was obsessed about the state of the world and the potential dangers. I also had thoughts about our mortality and the afterlife that I just couldn't shake. Those thoughts along with my new responsibilities seemed like a lot of pressure. Still, I didn't think about getting drugs mainly because I was breastfeeding and who wants a drugged up baby!

I tried to manage my thoughts and responsibilities by watching television--movies not news--and talking to my mommy friends. I learned that they had weird thoughts too.  So, I felt like I was in the club!

Apparently, other moms are using pharmaceuticals to help them during the early days of motherhood and beyond.  Recently, "Parenting Magazine" published a piece entitled, "Xanax Makes Me a Better Mom" and that piece has resulted in a firestorm of responses.   

Although I did not rely on drugs, I am sensitive to the feelings of moms who have and respect people to get what they need to make their lives work.

What are your thoughts? Is this the new mommy war, "sober parenting" v. "enhanced parenting"???
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Comments

Unknown said…
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Anonymous said…
I'm not a mother but found this pretty interesting... the one thing the article really doesn't go into is how certain of these drugs differ from each other. Xanax and Paxil are definitely not the same thing... anytime one decides to take a serotonin uptake inhibitor (like Paxil), they are basically deciding to have a small part of their brain become calcified over time (which means more serotonin is floating around, hence, the increased good feelings)... the problem is that your body can only create more serotonin based upon the serotonin that it has already released and then reabsorbed, and if you aren't reabsorbing, your body eventually ends up making less and less, which is why these drugs eventually stop working... these drugs are MUCH more dangerous than Big Pharma or our doctors lead us to believe. Just ask anyone who has ever tried to get off one of these drugs (I know several people that have had horrific experiences). Taking Xanax for a long period of time (over 3 mo) also has bad side effects... scary stuff - especially if you can find another, natural way to deal with the feelings.
Thanks for your insight! Definitely not an expert in pharmacology. So, I really appreciate your perspective.