Motherhood has reinforced my admiration for mothers, including my own. I know that women have been raising children for centuries, but my
God, it is hard work! And let’s not discuss how
babies are born.
Childbirth is a bitch! Of course I had heard that it was hard before I experienced myself. However, I truly had no idea what it would be like until it was my time.
My mother had three children without medication. Before I had my baby she failed to share one critical piece of information. It is VERY, VERY hard!
Quite frankly, had I known that natural
child birth would test my strength and resolve so much, I may have opted for
general anesthesia—forget the epidural. Hell, I may have turned back if I could have.
Each contraction overwhelmed me. I had expected pelvic pressure, but my expectations were misguided. The
pain felt like I had had been hit all over my body repeatedly with a two by four with nails sticking out of it. And just when the pain was beginning to wear off I would get hit again—harder!
Even though I chose
natural childbirth I had no idea that I could endure that kind of pain. I chose natural childbirth was because I was terrified. I was afraid of the having an epidural. The thought of having a needle inserted into my back, the pain of the injection, and the potential complications were enough to make me want to see if I could hire someone to have the baby for me! I was unable to use narcotics because they make me vomit. And I was afraid that my baby would be born all drugged up and develop a taste for drugs early. OK, not all of my fears were rational…
Even though my desire for a natural childbirth grew out of fear, I soon learned that it made me sound kind of badass. So, I stopped
thinking about me as a wimp and started thinking of me as an Amazon. I planned to conquer childbirth with a single bound and get a great blog entry as an added bonus.
Then I talked myself into it, as only I can do. Like
Richard Pryor and
Michael Jackson, I began to believe I was “b-a-d”! Naively, I believed that my marathon training had prepared me for childbirth. I believed that my prenatal yoga had given me thighs of steel and an impenetrable will. I thought that the breathing techniques that I learned in
Lamaze would help me stay centered. I also believed that my relationship with Andre would calmly reassure me when the going got tough. I looked forward to my labor and looked forward to having a brave tale to tell.
Comments
Neema is so beautiful and I'm sure every inch of pain you endured was worth. Saying that in hind sight and also coming from some one who has yet to give birth lol!
Enjoy her. Can't wait to hear more. Happy New Year!